“Don’t you think Boehner, ought to just, I don’t know, go drown himself in a vat of wine, you know – he could – he could be jumping up and down with his bare feet like remember Lucy did, remember that time, Lucy episode, I love Lucy, and Boehner would fall down in it and try to drink it all and just gurgle himself right into the great bar in the sky. It’s always five o’clock somewhere. Right, John?”

“[A]nyone who eats Shit Fil-A deserves to get the cancer that is sure to come from eating antibiotic filled tortured chickens 4Christ”

“Cheney deserves same final end he gave Saddam. Hope there are cellcams.”

“You know, it’s a wonder lightning just doesn’t strike people dead on the spot when they say stuff like [John Boehner said].”

“Five thousand Americans, tens of thousands permanently damaged and shot to pieces, a million Iraqis dead — that wasn’t bin Laden. That was George Bush.

So when does Seal Unit 6, or whatever it’s called, drop in on George Bush?”

“[T]he crux of our problem is that climate chaos isn’t divine retribution for pollution.”

“But hey, the budget deal that we announced on the show, it happened right on the show last week that they were going to cut almost $40 billion out of the budget. They were voting on it today. Apparently it went through the House. This of course is very bad news for like poor people, health programs for the poor were cut $600 million. The EPA was cut $1.6 billion. The good news: they cut all the money out of repairing federal buildings. So there was a slight chance a wall will collapse on Eric Cantor or Michele Bachmann.”

“On so many levels [S.E. Cupp]’s a perfect demonstration of the necessity of the work Planned Parenthood does.”